Why Are We Our Own Worst Enemy?

I f’ing hate it when men sabotage and disrespect women, particularly when they do it because of the way women look (too fat, too thin, too short, too tall, not pretty, blah blah blah) and it’s even more annoying when the men themselves actually look like ass (which happens A LOT), but reading this interview with Carol Lay reminds me why I hate it even more when we women do it to each other. 

I don’t know where Carol Lay gets off.  I really don’t.  We don’t need more hate and bad body dynamics…there is plenty in the world already.  The reviews on Amazon for her book so far are through the roof (5 stars across the board), but I just keep reminding myself that these are the people who obviously read diet books pretty frequently…and so I don’t really trust them to start with.  I’m happy for Carol Lay that she’s thin now and that it’s solved all her problems, but I really don’t need her preaching to me (or the rest of world) which is what this interview sounds like to me.

Carol Lay, if you’re listening (reading), go to this site and read as much as you can:  Kate Harding’s Shapely Prose.  Get back to me when you’ve learned something.  Ridiculous.


  1. TK42ONE’s avatar

    So, would now be a bad time to tell you that I think of you when I see that commercial of the lady in the city karate-kicking the donuts?

  2. 1979semifinalist’s avatar

    Yes TK42ONE, Yes now would be a terrible time to tell me that.


  3. TK42ONE’s avatar

    Well, I can see why Adam or my wife would be upset if I was thinking of you, but it’s meant to be a compliment. It’s not that I think of you when I see “slim fast” it’s that I think of you doing karate kicks and chops and hi-yas on the streets of the city.

    Does that ease the pain any?

  4. 1979semifinalist’s avatar

    No offense taken…I’m just very aggro about the “diets” being forced down women’s throats lately – maybe it’s this time of year (I seem to remember feeling similarly angry last year around this time). I don’t even have a specific problem with slim fast – in fact the only time I dieted down “successfully” to a weight I was somewhat happy with it was on slim fast. However, that is an impossible way to live long term, and so, like most women, I gained my weight back in full plus 10 pounds (I did more than the required plus 10 because I’m an overachiever like that).

    I did used to like to karate kick at my old job in LA though…when I moved away a co-worker said, “Who is going to fake karate kick at me randomly during the day?” I don’t know what happened to that girl that used to like to karate kick her way through the day…I feel like if I did a karate kick lately I’d break a hip… :)

  5. Adam’s avatar

    I can’t believe not only that you reviewed Gran Torino without seeing it, but that you panned it! PREEEEETTY SURE you’d have a different opinion of it if you bothered to see it. I mean, you seem to like open-minded art otherwise. That part of your page really surprised me.

  6. 1979semifinalist’s avatar

    Well to be fair Adam I didn’t actually review it I just said I was ranking it as one of the worst movies of the year in my opinion. I also wasn’t trying to hide the fact that I didn’t see it (or Twilight or Nights in Rodanthe).

    I also was trying to be funny (fail!)

    I do think I am generally pretty open minded – but I also really know what my personal likes and dislikes are in film and books and music and things, which is why I don’t read, watch or listen to certain things…they tend to be a waste of my time and money – neither of which I have in abundance. There is a certain amount of self censoring going on, it’s true, but it’s mostly to protect me from seeing and reading things that make me want to gouge out my eyes. It’s possible I miss a few gems out there, but in the case of Gran Tornio I’m PREEEEEEEETTY SURE I got it right.

    I will promise you this though – if I see Gran Torino in the next couple years (for free of course) and I do end up thinking highly of it, or at least finding something redeeming enough in it that it doesn’t warrant a “worst of 2008”, I will both update this post and write a new post about Gran Torino talking about how previews can lead people astray, and not being able to judge a book by its cover and all that.

    I will tell you though that I did this same exact thing last year with The Brave One, and hated it even more than I suspected I would.

    Also, please note that part of my dissatisfaction with what I saw in Gran Torino (cliches abounding would be number one) was that I think very highly of Clint Eastwood in general, both as an actor and director. I’ve been very moved by him in the past, and this film looked to me like a horrible compilation of a lot of things I hate, by a guy I really admire. And I hate when that happens.

  7. kfugrip’s avatar

    Ah the Gran Turino debate. We may have to see this movie just so we can talk about how terrible it is with complete accuracy. It’s part of the reason I’ve seen a couple of crappy movies. That way I can talk shit about them without any qualifiers (see Southland Tales).

  8. Adam’s avatar

    I just can’t believe all you people shamelessly putting a movie on a worst-list when you haven’t seen it. They string together a bunch of action-y looking scenes in the trailer because that’s what they have to do to get the majority of our retarded population to perk up. They really stress the “dirty harry” factor in the trailer, but the movie is about a lot more than that. It’s really sort of a study of a dirty harry type, and what is wrong with that in the first place, and whether someone like that can ever become anything else. It’s not the BEST movie ever made, but it’s far from the WORST. And…really…WORST of 2008?! 10,000BC, 27 Dresses, Beverly Hills Chihuahua, College Road Trip, Death Race, Definitely Maybe, Disaster Movie, Drillbit Taylor, First Sunday, FOOL’S GOD (for God’s sake!), Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Get Smart, HAMLET 2, HANCOCK, The Happening, THE HOTTIE AND THE NOTTIE, HOUSE BUNNY, The Incredible Hulk, Indian Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, Lakeview Terrace, Madagascar 2, MADE OF HONOR, Mamma Mia, MEET DAVE, Meet the Spartans, The Mummy Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL, OVER HER DEAD BODY, The Rocker, Sex and the City, Space Chimps, SPEED RACER, Wanted, WELCOME HOME ROSCOE JENKINS, WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS, Witness Protection, The Women. You’re saying that there aren’t 10 movies in that list that are worse? Hell, the ones I capitalized alone are absolutely inarguably worse, and there are 12 of those. I think the whole list is worse and there are 37 of those! I think that you are being EXTREMELY unrealistic saying Gran Torino, which you have never seen is worse than at least 28 of these movies. You don’t need to write another blog about judging a book by its cover. In fact, if you count the dust jacket as the cover, you can get a much better idea of a book from its cover than you can about Gran Torino from its trailer. I’m proud to say I saw it. I’m proud to say I liked it.

  9. 1979semifinalist’s avatar


    You are certainly welcome to your opinion and we are free to disagree, but I’m guessing based on your two posts here that perhaps this is just not the blog for you. Considering you put Forgetting Sarah Marshall on your potential list of the 37 worst movies of 2008, and I list it in my post as the 5th BEST film of 2008…clearly we just have very different tastes.

    As I tried to explain earlier, I’m aware I’ve got a self censoring process when it comes to films, largely to protect me from wasting my time, my money, and keeping me from gouging out my eyes. This process does prevent me from seeing many of the films on your “37 Worst of 2008”. Of those 37 I only saw 6, one of which (Forgetting Sarah Marshall) I considered a best of 2008, and three of which I mentioned in my list (Sex and the City and 27 Dresses which I eviscerated and Wanted which I listed as mediocre at best), the other two – The Happening, which I didn’t like but thought had some redeeming qualities and Hancock, which I didn’t love but found interesting and not even in consideration for “worst”. So this actually leaves me with very few truly bad movies seen in 2008…I’ve gotten pretty good at not seeing shit movies – which is why I made the joke (clearly not funny to you and how many others I may never know) about picking three “big” movies that I did not see that made my stomach turn, just from watching the previews – which I had to sit through many many many times The worst movie that I ACTUALLY saw – as I said – was The Other Boleyn Girl. 27 Dresses and Sex and the City were also deserving of a lashing – and got it.

    All that said, the point I tried to make in my earlier comment (and obviously failed) is that you cannot really compare The Hottie and the Nottie and Gran Torino…they’re not even in the same league. I have expectations for Gran Torino because I have high expectations for Clint Eastwood as both an actor and a director. Obviously The Hottie and the Nottie is a film that shouldn’t even be made…I’m not talking to that crowd…I like to pretend that crowd doesn’t exist quite frankly because it makes me sad.

    As I said before, whether you care or not, I will make a point of seeing the film sometime in the future (considering my boyfriend is getting hassled to see it as well, maybe it will be sooner rather than later), and will write a post about what I actually think of the film AFTER seeing it and update the existing post if necessary. I know me, so I know I’m honest enough to be truthful about what I really see or don’t see in the film – you don’t know me and so probably don’t believe I can be objective at this point…but I don’t know what I can do about that.

    I appreciate your comments regardless of our differing opinions – passion is always good…misplaced or otherwise. JOKE! That last bit about being misplaced is a good-natured joke I SWEAR!

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