okay, i know i should get shit for not having ever been to Penn Station after living in New York for 2 years (and three months) however, after having been there this morning at 6am, i have to say, “what the fuck?”  there is no reason to go to this crap hole on purpose unless you cannot avoid it.  as my co-worker Jason would say, “it is Craptastic!” perhaps i have been pampered too much by my frequent trips to Grand Central Station, but having now seen the other option, why would i ever go back to Penn unless i had a gun to my head?  in fact, when we have something as well, GRAND as Grand Central, it is insulting to also have something like Penn Station.  first of all, the shit, as far as i can tell is not air-conditioned…and in 6am 90 degree august New York humid ass heat, that is unenjoyable to say the least.  second, the layout/organization is ridiculous…the signage is third-rate at best and i, a pretty efficient and sufficient new yorker that gets around the city just fine had to ask for directions, which i never do…i pity the poor tourists from well, anywhere really.  third, the line is tremendous.  having never been there before and not knowing exactly what i was getting into i arrived quite early for my train, but no fewer than six people in front of me missed their trains while standing in the massive queue to get a ticket, or to pick one up.  i realize now i could have used the kiosk probably to get my ticket, but initially only saw kiosks that were out of order with signs that looked written by six year olds (how classy and modern).  a giant fan was cooling the giant queue line and let me tell you that was REALLY working (read: intense sarcasm).  fourth, once you have your ticket you have to stand like an idiot with a crowd of other idiots staring at a giant updating screen like it is a god, waiting for your train to be posted so you know what gate you are going to, then when you (and everyone else) sees what gate you belong at there is a massive disorganized run, which is borderline dangerous if you’re going to a popular destination.  there is no getting a coffee and settling in with a book to wait for your train, there aren’t even really any chairs, well not where i was.  fifth, they should have a warning sign about the bathrooms, or perhaps they just shouldn’t have bathrooms…not only were they disgusting and scary and crowded (at 6 am no less) but i saw the biggest fucking cockroach i have seen since moving to new york hanging out casually in one of the bathrooms…so advanced was this mutant cockroach, i think it asked me if i could spare a square.  here’s the good news…the train itself was lovely.  a nice scenic little trip, not crowded and insanely comfortable, especially when compared with flying coach these days…which i can’t even get into and i will be having to do in six days…oy!…curse my long ass legs and round ass (we won’t get into how big or small…we’re just going with round).  

so in the final analysis…

train travel?  yea!

Amtrak?  undecided

Penn Station?  burn it to the ground