publishing

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Following through on my mind-numbing research, I submitted five queries for my book this week. 

Three via email, as it was the “preferred method” for those agencies, one via regular mail, and one with their “online form” which is that agency’s preferred method.  I hated using the online form, however I must confess that it does eliminate a lot of the mistakes it is so easy to make when querying. 

Five queries still isn’t exactly a wide net, and it only brings my total since August 2007 to eight, but I figured I’d track them here (much like my short fiction submissions) so you could all share in the anguish (lucky you!). 

Of the 8 Queries, they languish in these stages:

My first query, we’ll call it Query #1 (shocker), received a request for a partial.  Partial was then rejected within about two months, with a few helpful and some not so helpful comments.  Agent did nicely leave the door open for me to send my graphic novel when complete (or further along) which is great. 

#2, submitted via regular mail almost three months ago.  This agency claims to respond to queries within 3 -4 weeks.  Hmm.  Did I get lost in the mail?  Did they hate it so much that it’s pinned up on some “laughing board” (I made that up…but it totally exists in my paranoid mind).  Is it just a mistake…should I re-query?  Ah, questions with no answers – love them!

#3, submitted via email 3 weeks ago, no reponse as yet.  This agency does not promise to get back to you if they’re not interested.  Sigh.

#4, #5, and #6 submitted via email this week.  Of those, #6 got back to me within 24 hours with an incredibly nice note and a request for a partial (first five chapters) and bio etc.  Nothing yet on #4 and #5.

#7 submitted via regular mail this week to a HUGE agency which I have little hope of cracking.

#8 submitted via “online agency form” this week, which was rejected within, I think, 18 hours.  Sarcastic Joy!

So there it is.  Of eight agency queries, two have requested partials, one never got back to me, one rejected me immediately, and four are still out there simmering.  It’s hard to feel too badly about this when I’ve gotten two hits, out of four…that’s 50% and that’s pretty damn good.  If the other four come back as rejections though those numbers will not look so great.

It’s also sad to realize that my strength may in fact be in query letter writing and not in novel writing.  *big sigh*

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How was everyone’s weekend?  I literally buried myself in this depressing query crap, it was so disheartening.  I also realized that I probably should re-write my book, which I’ve always considered a “part one of three” into just a massive one book epic.  Sigh.  Last thing on earth I want to do, but all the advice seems to point to that being the “smart choice”.  I did escape for a few hours on Sunday to see Juno (it was pretty good, but overhyped) and to get a Lobster Roll, which though still good was the worst one I’ve had since I discovered them last June… :(  A bit of a bummer weekend overall I guess.  I’m feeling pretty low about all of it.  How about you guys…do anything good this weekend? 

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Ack. I think we, and by we I mean the insanely talented but tortured writers out there (joke), all feel this way about the query letter process. I don’t know about many other actual personal experiences outside of my own (except what I read about on my best friend ‘the interwebs’) but for me I can’t decide if I’ve been blessed or cursed.

I had the advantage/disadvantage of having my very first agent query letter (to the agent I researched and really really thought I wanted) come back within a week with an email request for a partial (the first 50 pages). JOY! This partial was rejected by email about 2 months later with some helpful (and some less than helpful) notes. Less than joy.

I have sent two queries since – one has been out there for almost three months with no response and the other for three weeks with no response. I completely recognize that this is not exactly a “wide net” to cast. I also recognize that I already have great statistics considering what I’ve actually put out there and the response I’ve gotten. It it still a completely frustrating and self destructive process. Also, I felt good initially that though my first agent didn’t want me or my book he apparently thought I had a good query letter. Good right? A good query letter is almost as good as a good novel…yet no response to my new queries, which though tailored to the specific agents, were largely the same as the first. *SIGH* Apparently my query letter was not made of magic.

I often wish I could be one of those writers that is totally convinced they are brilliant – and that their novel is the best novel ever written. Although agents, and agent assistants, and really everyone, hates those kind of people and nine times out of ten (okay ten times out of ten) they’re delusional anyway, it still must be nice to just feel so confident in your work. I have doubts about my work every moment…actually that’s a lie, I vacillate wildly (especially when I’m actually writing) between “I AM A GOLDEN GOD! I AM A GENIUS!” to ten minutes later “I AM THE WORST OF HACKS. I AM THE HACKIEST HACKY HACK HACK THAT EVER DARED SIT AT A COMPUTER”. These two thoughts can be about the exact same sentence, plot, arc, character, or even title, merely ten minutes apart.

I think I’m also pretty realistic about the state of ‘the process’ and the state of publishing in general. The reality is that you CAN actually have written a great book and that STILL does not mean you are ever getting published…so what hope is there for those of us that maybe have a great book idea that is maybe well written or is maybe timely…it’s pretty debilitating.

I am making a concerted effort this weekend though, no excuses and “sad pile of low self-esteem and mania” be damned, to cast a wide net of query letters. Look out world…a mediocre bi-polar mess is comin’ out…

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