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Most Bizarre Search Terms

October 7, 2009 in awesomeness, blogging, comics | 2 comments

A lot of strange words come together to send people to this blog. I’ve done a bunch of comics (like the one above – and you can see some here, here, here, and here) about the bizarre search terms that have brought people to 1979 Semi-Finalist, but this week I got one of my weirdest. Are you ready?

“Sexually Enchanting Long Legged Ladies”

Awesome.

What do you think someone is really looking for with search terms like that? It boggles the mind.

Anyway, just wanted to share, you may now continue with your day. 🙂

I Don’t Know…I’m Kinda Pissed At Brad

October 6, 2009 in television | Permalink

On the Rachel Zoe project last week and now this week, part of the focus has been on the fact that Rachel was unable to take both Taylor and Brad to Paris Fashion Week – something they were both desperate to attend. Rachel screwed up royally by being afraid to make the decision about who should go. She first tried to pseudo-guilt Brad into volunteering to stay behind since Taylor has seniority; and then when that did not work she screwed it up a second time by putting Taylor in charge of the decision of who should go. Taylor surprised the hell out of me by saying that she thought Brad should go, and then Brad surprised the hell out of me by saying “Thanks. I’ll go. See ya!”

A single episode of reality television is rarely so shocking to me.

At the end of the day, I was impressed by Taylor’s uncharacteristic selflessness and totally bummed out by Brad’s opportunistic behavior. I’m sure anyone that’s good at career advancement (not me) would say that Brad made the right decision. That he wanted to go and so when presented with the opportunity he took it. He knew it would be an amazing experience, one that he might never get to duplicate and that he would meet incredibly powerful people and possibly make important networking contacts. But he kinda screwed over his friend, a friend that pretty surprisingly tried to put him first.

Had they had equal time at Zoe’s office, then I would have looked a little more kindly on Brad’s acceptance of the offer from Taylor, but Brad knew she was offering only to be nice, and that she desperately wanted to go, and that quite frankly she had earned it in ways that he has not (and because Brad is Brad and Taylor is Taylor he maybe never will). Brad makes for brilliant television (I love him) and he’s a great playmate for Rachel, he’s also wonderful at networking and going to fabulous parties, and I think he’ll probably be a great stylist in his own right someday. Taylor only likes the occasional party and is usually more interested in getting the work done than having a fabulous time. Taylor is the workhorse that keeps that entire operation running and she deserved the trip. And maybe she should have grabbed it with both hands when it was offered to her as Brad did…maybe this will make her less successful in business…but her strength of character impressed me. Without Taylor I’m not sure there is a successful Rachel Zoe. Sure, eventually Zoe could get it back together, but considering her health issues while she still actually HAS Taylor doing all the heavy lifting, her business would suffer a huge hit…maybe one that’s not recoverable.

I guess my point is, that in watching the episode, I just didn’t feel this was about business, it was about friendship, and Taylor was trying to be a good friend in offering Brad the opportunity…and I’m sure part of her perhaps passive aggressively hoped he’d return the favor and say “No, Taylor, I appreciate the offer, but you have seniority and you’ve earned it, if only one of us can go, you should go. I’ll go next time.” I know that’s what I was expecting him to say. And I was disappointed he didn’t. That kind of behavior will probably make him more successful in his career…but I doubt it will make him any great and lasting friends.

Totally unrelated Rachel Zoe sidenote: Rachel! You must stop using the word literally. By using it in EVERY sentence you make the word meaningless. Please stop.

Ah, The Time My Life Will Be Happiness Again Has Been Named…

October 2, 2009 in adult swim, awesomeness, cartoon network, cartoons, premieres, the venture brothers, things that are made of win! | 5 comments

And that time is October 18th at Midnight.

According to Jackson Publick’s livejournal, THE VENTURE BROTHERS SEASON 4 will premiere on Cartoon Network’s Adult Swim on Sunday, October 18th at Midnight…which I guess technically is October 19th, but whatever…don’t let it confuse you and miss out.

All I have to say is….GO TEEEEEAM VENTURE!

Thanks to reader eowyn324 for alerting me to this awesome news that broke today.

And if the title to this post makes no sense to you, check out this one, which will make everything make, um, sense. Probably.

Really Marvel? Really?!

October 2, 2009 in comics, feminism, feminist rage, feminist rants, halloween, holidays, marvel comics, misogynistic bullshit | 5 comments

My friend Josh sent me this link to Marvel’s “Women of Marvel” Halloween Costumes and said he thought it would be good “fodder for my blog”. And he’s so right. But I must be tired of fighting this unwinable (not a word) fight because all I can come up with is REALLY MARVEL? REALLY!?!

Actually, I tried, but even exhausted, I can’t just say nothing. I know we (I’m speaking for all women everywhere here – so that should tell you how tired I am) do sometimes like to dress up like sluts for Halloween – it’s a nice opportunity to get our slutty selves out there with less public shaming, cause it’s Halloween and well, anything goes! And we can just pretend tomorrow that it didn’t happen! But c’mon Marvel, do you really have to stoop to the absolute lowest freaking common denominator?

First of all, a superheroine costume is pretty slutty to begin with – all skin tight and ridiculous – it’s not like you actually have to make it sluttier. I mean, until now I wasn’t even sure it was possible in some cases. The Spider-girl costume is perhaps the most disgusting, because, I don’t know, she’s SPIDERGIRL. I mean, I’ll give you the Emma Frost/White Queen costume, because frankly, compared to some of Emma’s outfits that costume is actually pretty tame (although SUPER tacky – Emma would never be caught dead in that shit). BUT WTF…AN AMERICAN DREAM COSTUME? That’s barely even a real character! And that’s not remotely HER COSTUME!

I’m sorry, AM I SHOUTING?! IT’S PROBABLY BECAUSE I AM INSANE WITH RAGE.

Ahem. Yeah, “American Dream” barely a real superhero…I mean, even comic nerds that see you in this costume are going to be all…”Really? American Dream? She’s uh…so…uh…minor. Where’s Storm, or Jean Grey, or She-Hulk, or Ms. Marvel, or…I mean the list is endless.” So those of you who don’t know about superheroes, you might want to stick with Hooker Spider-girl, or Working Girl Black Cat, which, though completely fucking ridiculous, are at least superheroes people will actually recognize…sort of.

Top Five Iconic Covers

October 1, 2009 in art, artists, cartoons, comics, feminism, feminist rants, rants, rogue | 3 comments

Brian Cronin over at CBR has been doing a Top Five Most Iconic Covers for individual characters, and it’s a really great idea (read: I wish I’d thought of it first). Like most idiots with an opinion I have often been disagreeing with some of his picks, but having learned first hand how hard it is to pick a “top” anything, I’ve been keeping my mouth shut. But he featured my girl Rogue this week and I can no longer be silenced!

Here are Cronin’s picks.

The list isn’t even that bad, I think in my own list (see below) I have to use three of the five he uses, however the use of that Paul Smith cover as number one is just criminal. That cover is completely a Wolvie cover, not a Rogue cover and while the actual issue marks pretty big developments for the character and her evolution, the cover does not relay that same message. Epic fail.

So here’s MY list:

5. Andy Kubert

As discussed on my Best 100 Covers post, as an adult and as an artist, I kind of hate this cover for a lot of reasons, but as a 16 year old girl, my heart literally went all ‘pitter pat’ in my chest and didn’t stop for, like, YEARS. And independent of my personal feelings, this relationship was a major part of Rogue’s 90’s storyline, and affected her character hugely both at this point in time and (for good or ill) pretty much the rest the character’s life thus far.

4. Walt Simonson

Cronin is right that this cover is iconic because of the “hope you survive the experience” homage that at this point had become classic and iconic on its own, but perhaps it’s even more iconic because in Rogue’s case it was a more accurate statement than ever before. Although, perhaps they should have changed up the meme to read, “Welcome To The X-Men Rogue…Hope The X-Men Survive The Experience” considering the fact that the entire team tries to quit on principle when Xavier lets her in.

3. John Romita Jr.

This is a great cover, and a great issue, that was a huge development in Rogue’s growth as a character. It foreshadowed great things for the character and managed to be a milestone issue for both Rogue and Storm. Neither of them would ever be the same after this issue – and that is the mark of a great comic – and this cover conveys that feeling – which is the mark of a great cover.

2. Marc Silvestri

This Genosha storyline was a big turning point for Rogue, both emotionally as she battled the unexpected side effects of losing her cursed powers; and perhaps even more importantly, it spotlighted the relationship with the Carol Danvers personality living inside of her. This was the first arc (if I recall correctly) that Rogue and Danvers agreed on an uneasy peace, if only for their combined survival. And it kicked off a fantastic ongoing storyline about their constant battle for control of Rogue’s body.

1. Jim Lee

And here’s where control of that body comes to a head, more than thirty issues later. This milestone issue featured the final and long awaited separation of Carol Danvers and Rogue with surprising results after Rogue was shot through the Siege Perilous by Dazzler (you bitch Dazzler). This issue is important both because it truly highlights how much our heroine has changed, and because as a result of this issue, there are new rules for Rogue and Danvers. They’ve been permanently separated, but Rogue has retained the powers. For good or ill this changed Rogue’s direction and is a critical arc in her evolution. It’s also gorgeous, but you guys know I’m a fan.

Ironically, I think that this cover to X-Men Classic #77…

…really proves my point about why Cronin’s pick of X-Men #173 is a real miss. The cover above, a re-imagining by Adam Hughes of the original Paul Smith X-Men #173 cover is a pretty great example of a Rogue cover…with the positions reversed like this (i.e. Rogue in front instead of back) it works as a Rogue cover, but would you ever in a million years put this on a list of most iconic Wolverine covers? No way. Now of course Wolvie has more iconic covers out there than just about any other Marvel character, but still, I’m sure you can see my point.

Just for fun here are a few of my other favorite covers featuring Rogue. I wouldn’t call them all iconic, but I would call them all awesome. It’s a little bit shocking actually, how few powerful and truly moving covers Rogue has, she’s been a fan favorite for a long time, and it’s really not evident in looking up her covers…

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Premiere Grades Are In…

September 28, 2009 in television, television reviews, the good wife | 8 comments

…let’s see how everyone did, shall we? Some definite surprises.

NEW SHOWS I’M TRYING OUT

The Good Wife: A- I really thought this worked. Julianna Margulies was great and the writing was good, it’s the best hour long drama I’ve seen in a long time (maybe since season 1 of Damages?…which was really more of a thriller). It’s also nice to see a lawyer show that isn’t quite a procedural and a drama that isn’t just a drama…so far it’s a nice blend of the two. I’m optimistic.

FlashForward: B+ This was interesting. I’m still totally into the concept, and I think the execution was mostly good. Some really great clues were presented to a fascinating larger picture and the acting was pretty solid. I do have some complaints (of course I do!) the biggest of which is the unreality of which this epic (and global) situation was presented and yet within a few hours everyone has cell service (no way), everyone seems to have power (also no way), and despite some looting shown and viewers being told that half the country is under ‘martial law’ we really see non of that reflected in the quiet eyes of our main characters who are pretty much just going about their daily lives as if everything is just fine.

One of the main characters – Dr. Olivia is actually calmly sipping a fancy coffee and questioning her friend (another doctor) about where he was the previous day in a completely peaceful hospital setting. I’m sorry, that place would be a shitstorm. There would be no coffee…there would be only chaos.

Does anyone not remember Hurricane Katrina? That was ONE city destroyed and it took a months for people to get basic things like medical care, food, and evacuation. And still today, YEARS later that city and many of its people are still suffering greatly. I know that they want to move this plot along and so they can only spend a small amount of time on this, but it really took a huge logical leap for me to come along with them that this is the reality in Los Angeles less than 24 hours after a global event of these proportions. Hopefully the show won’t ask me for anymore logical stretches anytime soon as I think I’ve used up all my mental leaps for this show.

Community: B+ This is the surprise hit of the list. I laughed out loud…probably half a dozen times and the cast felt like they’d been together for years, rather than a pilot episode, which often has a lot of rough edges. I’m not sure where they’re going to go from here but it was definitely good enough to hook me into a few new more episodes.

Bored To Death: B+ In addition to having the “best opening sequence ever!” I thought this was a good start. A little slow, likely because the premise and character were nicely laid out, leaving little room for “the action!”, but I love all three main characters already. Ted Danson delivered a hilarious performance that looks like it will only get better. Zach Galifianakis was great as the best friend and I personally really liked Jason Schwartzman’s understated performance, but I’m a fan in general. I think the only thing I’m worried about so far is that women seem to be a bit underrepresented and even stereotyped a little…but 1. It’s only a first episode and 2. As I’m sure Adam would say, “not EVERYTHING is about women, Kelly,” and he’s right…but it wouldn’t hurt to have a solid female lead or supporting character in there. Hint. Hint.

Curb Your Enthusiasm: B+ A welcome addition back into my line up. I’m not great with uncomfortable comedy (The Office was hard for me at first) and Larry David is the MOST uncomfortable comedy guy of all time…but I love this show anyway. The improv, the great guest stars, the “Seinfeldian story lines”…it’s all good.

Modern Family: B- Funny, but not as funny as the ads had led me to believe. I’ll give it another chance, maybe two, but it isn’t working on all the levels the way Community is yet. There were some moments of pure comedy genius though (the BB gun and the Lion King theme song being two that stuck out). Because the three families in question are related (a father and his two grown children and their respective families) it keeps the cast a little white, which I find a little uninteresting. They are obviously trying to get away from that and be more diverse – two gay men and a Vietnamese baby, and Dad’s new Latina wife and son…but when you count it up you still end up with seven white folks and three non-white (one of whom is a baby and probably will be for the foreseeable future). But it’s only the first episode and maybe they will find a way to work in even more MODERN diversity, which is part of what I think I expect because of the title.

The New Adventures of Old Christine: C This left me wanting. There were a few funny bits, but not enough to carry it. The chemistry between the cast is great, they all feel like old neurotic friends, but Wanda Sykes was by far the funniest and most watchable. Everyone else seemed a bit pale in comparison (no pun intended).

PREMIERES OF SHOWS I ALREADY WATCH:

The Office: A- A really solid opener. Laugh out loud funny. I always forget how great this show is when I’m away from it for a while. It gets docked because Michael seemed to have regressed a little from his growth last year.

30 Rock: n/a Please come back 30 Rock…I miss you!

SHOWS I’VE ALREADY BEEN WATCHING:

Top Chef: A- Top Chef is a good show, what can I say. Padma and Colicchio are great hosts, the show creates solid incredibly difficult challenges, and because there are two challenges per episode (quick fire and elimination) the show moves at a breakneck pace. It’s just really good reality television.

Project Runway: C- Tim Gunn is still the savior of the show, and I honestly don’t even mind it being in LA this season (Adam does…a lot) but the designers aren’t as interesting and possibly aren’t as talented, although it’s hard to tell because the challenges have been fairly ho-hum so far. The show is also seriously hurting from the lack of Michael Kors and Nina Garcia. Lastly, I HATE watching Lifetime’s commercials. I really can’t watch this show unless it’s Tivo’d because the commercials for the other Lifetime shows make me want to vomit.

SHOWS I PRETEND I’M NOT WATCHING, BUT LET’S FACE IT, I AM:

Flipping Out: A- My friend Jason is in trouble for getting me addicted to this show. Jeff Lewis, who constantly seems like the biggest dick of all time (and sometimes genuinely is) is actually one of the funniest driest people in the entire world. He’s that guy that says something super sarcastic and cruel and while you’re waiting for him to cut it with a smile or a laugh, he just moves on. But he was joking…he WAS totally joking. But you’ll always be wondering. Jeff Lewis is one in a million and I’ve ended up totally loving him despite his dickishness. Also, Zoila for the freaking win.

The Rachel Zoe Project: B+ Yeah, I’m one of those people that likes Rachel Zoe. She has her faults sure, but compared to the divas I usually see on reality TV (I’m looking at you, you worthless housewives) she seems shockingly down to earth. I don’t know, I just think she’s trying her best. I find Taylor pretty annoying (and I would never hire her – she should be careful if she does leave Zoe) but when she takes the gigantic stick out of her ass she’s pretty funny. Brad is so easy to watch it’s like eating cookie dough….if he doesn’t come out of this with his own show (or something) I’d be shocked.

House Hunters: B; House Hunters International: A- Explaining my addiction to these shows is difficult, but in HH Regular edition’s case I think it mostly comes down to a desire to no longer be a renter. I want to own something rather than flushing my money down the toilet each month to a landlord (and I live in Manhattan – so it’s usually more than your average mortgage payment that I flush). In HH International’s case it comes down (I think) to an intense desire to travel and be more worldly.

NEW SHOWS I CAUGHT A GLIMPSE OF AND AM REALLY GLAD I’M NOT PLANNING TO EVER SEE AGAIN:

Accidentally on Purpose: Jenna Elfman, you had your chance, it was called Dharma and Greg. It sucked and yet it stayed on the air FOREVER. Let it go. Give someone else a chance. I do love Ashley Jensen though, she was one of the best things about Extras. Also, why are these characters ALL white. I’m so sick of white people (myself included).

Gary Unmarried: Didn’t Jay Mohr used to be funny? What happened?

SHOWS THAT I TRIED AGAIN, BUT STILL CAN’T LOVE

How I Met Your Mother: Despite my deep deep love of Jason Segel, and my affection for Neil Patrick Harris and Alyson Hannigan (Willow 4Eva!) I just don’t get what people love about this show. I’ve tried many times over the years to “get it” but I just don’t. It’s not like I think it’s the worst show on television…it’s not bad…I guess I just thought our standards would be higher for “best show ever!” which is what I always hear from the die hard HIMYM fans. I watched the premiere and I didn’t laugh out loud (maybe once) and at the end I was all, “Eh.”

Also, at the risk of getting yelled at by millions of HIMYM fans, Josh Radnor is totally the weak link in that cast…yet he’s sort of the “star”. This annoys me. Lastly, since I said it for Elfman’s new show, I think I have to say it here as well…this cast of characters are REALLY white. I’m so bored of all white all straight characters…no matter how pretty they are.

Happy 30th Birthday Scott

September 24, 2009 in family, holidays | 1 comment

Happy Birthday to my brother Scott – 30 years old today. He’s the one dragging Dave across the carpet, while Dave apparently does an impersonation of Christ.

Wednesday Comics…The Best Thing Since Sliced Bread? I Say YES.

September 23, 2009 in art, artists, awesomeness, comics, paul pope | 5 comments

Someone at DC deserves a raise (probably Mark Chiarello) because the limited 12 issue run Wednesday Comics is the best idea (and the best execution of said idea) I’ve seen in a very long time. These beautiful, full color newsprint broadsheet style comics, each telling 16 individual full page on-going weekly stories by some of the most talented writers and artists working in comics today are quite frankly…awesome.

The real genius of the project comes from DC Art Director Mark Chiarello approaching some of the absolute best writers and artists in the industry and simply asking them what character and story they would most like to tell given the opportunity. That freedom to tell any story, to take on any character, without having to worry (so much) about all the other stuff – like heavy editorial interference (etc.) had absolutely breathtaking results. The authors and illustrators love for the characters and story is not only palpable, but contagious.

EXCERPT FROM MARK CHIARELLO’S INTERVIEW WITH NEWSARAMA:

MC: I think that’s an astute observation. In comics, creators are often asked what they would want to do with a certain character within certain boundaries, but this is “what do you want to do?” from the very start.

That’s what I did when I did Solo, I picked the artists, like Tim Sale, for example, and just let him go. As an artist myself, I can tell you that you’re very rarely asked to do what you really want to do – historically, I think every comic book company could take a bit of a lesson from that. I don’t think someone called Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons and said, “We’ve got this idea called Watchmen that we’d like you to take a go at.” That sprung from them.

Emphasis mine. And what a great lesson that is. I hope that Chiarello quote gets posted on the walls of corporations everywhere.

I didn’t read all of the stories, mostly because some characters just interest me more than others – for example despite Dave Gibbons being an utter genius I’ve just never been that interested in Kamandi. There are a few cases where the format does not work to the authors’ advantage such as in the Wonder Woman strip. Ben Caldwell’s Wonder Woman has perhaps some of my favorite illustration work in the entire series, but the layout for the story is overly complicated, too small, and confusing, making it nearly impossible to read. At some point (issue #2?) I gave up on reading Wonder Woman…but that’s the great thing about Wednesday Comics…where one story fails one person or another, there is still so much left to choose from and to still get incredible enjoyment (not to mention your money’s worth) out of a single issue.

Above: Caldwell’s Wonder Woman – beautiful!

The art across the board is fantastic, although Amanda Conner, Eduardo Risso, Joe Quinones, Brenden Fletcher, Rob Leigh, Kyle Baker, and Lee Bermejo stand out as particularly exceptional.

My personal favorites are Batman (natch), Superman, Green Lantern (shocking! I’ve never thought of myself as a Hal Jordan fan), Flash, Deadman, Metamorpho, and The Demon and The Cat Woman. I’m not usually a fan of the silliness of super pets but Palmiotti’s Supergirl is a nice breath of fresh air in the usually so serious superhero world and Conner’s cartooning for Supergirl really cannot be beat.

Above: Amanda Conner’s Supergirl

I think one of the things that Wednesday Comics also nails, without perhaps even trying to, is their success in capturing the nostalgia of a simpler time. I’m not that old (okay, I’m sorta old) but I never really had the true youth experience of reading superhero comics in the newspaper like many others, but I can still appreciate the format and it somehow still reminds me of my childhood, which given all the screw ups in comics these days is really one of the reasons I always come back to them. Better memories of simpler times in my life…and my perceived belief that that meant a simpler time in the world at large.

Above: Eduardo Risso’s Batman

Today (9/23/09) marks the last issue of the twelve week, twelve issue run. The finale in a great experiment that I hope DC will make a habit of – perhaps every summer for the rest of my life? Or better yet, perhaps they can find a way to translate what made these stories so refreshing and wonderful to their regular books…now wouldn’t that be a sight?

You can pick up Wednesday Comics #1 – 12 at your local comic book store – or if you’re having trouble tracking some of the issues down, you can find them on Amazon (some are already above cover price – so don’t delay). Also, below the jump you can see the writer and artist for each of the strips.

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Already We Have A Problem…

September 22, 2009 in television, television reviews | 5 comments

…with the TV watching schedule and hopeful early drop outs…Community was actually really good. One of the better first episodes of a comedy I’ve ever seen. There were several laugh out loud moments and most of the rest was regular funny and enjoyable. The cast had really good chemistry. Like the kind of chemistry you expect from a show that’s in its second or third year. As predicted Chevy Chase was the least interesting aspect to me but it’s now in the Tivo…so somebody else is going to have to drop out…volunteers?

Conundrum.

Things That Use Electricity

September 21, 2009 in craptastic, food, rants | Permalink

And me are not getting along.

Last week my electric tea kettle, which I use a couple times a week, if not daily, broke. It is only six months old. My previous kettle which I had for four years broke last spring. This very pretty Krups one I replaced it with apparently sucks. I am also too stupid and lazy to fill out my warranty for a $60 item. So I’m out of luck.

Today, my “fit and fresh” single serving blender thing-a-ma-bob informed me it too was broken. WHAT. THE. HELL. This thing is less than three months old and I’ve probably used it only 20 times. And now I’ve got a bunch of strawberries, milk, and protein powder mixed together that can’t be blended. Sonofabitch.

This sucks. grumble. grumble. grumble.

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